Ask the Readers: Groups in the Church
“We’ve got a great youth group.”
“Our older ladies are so involved.”
“You’ll just love our single’s class.”
These, and other statements like them, are often used to draw people to a particular congregation. The thought is that, by knowing there are others who have the same–or similar–place in life at a congregation, one will be more likely to visit and, potentially, identify.
Obviously, having those ties helps. It does help the young adult with small children to know that others are facing that time in life. It is a great thing for a teen to know that their peers also care about the things of God. We need to have those groups and the activities they do together.
However, we don’t need to be with “our group” only! I want to challenge you to seek ways to interact with those of all different backgrounds within your congregation.
Some congregations do well to have meals or other “laid back” activities where the older can interact with the younger, or where married people are with those who are widowed. The value of these relationships is immense.
Sadly, other congregations, either by tradition or even by programs, segregate the members into their own little groups. The only time they are ever in the same room is for worship, and then they sit with only their little group.
Now, we need your input. What can we do? What are some ways a congregation can encourage different segments of the congregation to work and fellowship together?
6 Comments
Carl Jenkins
Where I minister, there is really no one around our age/demographic which of course has forced us to interact with all different groups of Christians. It has been tough at times, but a blessing more often than not.
Dean Kelly
I agree that we have to be careful that we don’t divide instead of unite a congregation, while trying to reach each individual. One simple thing that we do, and that has been done by many congregations that I know of, is to have one “group” honor another “group”: have a meal where the youth serve the elderly; or one where young adults serve the elderly, or the youth; the elderly serve the youth, etc. It is a simple thing, but it does give contact in a congregation between people who naturally gravitate to those who are in their same “group.”
RW McAlister
Our congregation has organized “Fellowship Groups” in the past that combine small groups of people who don’t usually spend time together outside of worship. Groups were encouraged to have meals in each other’s homes, go out together, etc. The idea was to build relationships with people we don’t normally “hang out with” & learn more about them. It’s done good in terms of bonding many of us closer together.
Wayne Gordon
‘Clique’ was a buzz-word often used for the teenagers when I was one. We were criticized for belonging to a unique group-one where others were excluded or did not feel comfortable trying to become a part of. Now that I am much older, that word has followed me to this age as well. It’s true that we often become ‘comfortable’ with those of like mind. We enjoy being around others who have some of the same values. Each day can become routine where we stay in our comfort zone and do not wish to branch out. Until you are the one on the outside, it’s difficult to imagine what it feels like. Just because each day for you includes belonging and having relationships doesn’t mean that is true for the next individual. I have often been accused of not being friendly when in fact I think it is more of an introverted disposition. Rather than include myself into someone else’s company, I would rather be invited. Maybe we all need lessons on how to relate to people of all walks. I need to make a better effort at ‘inviting’ myself into the company of others and perhaps others need to be more willing to do the inviting.
Amber
In addition to service projects where one group “serves” another, I think it’s important to have programs that almost “force” interaction between age groups. From an all out effort like an “adopt a Grandparent” program so a simple effort like making sure there are all age groups represented in worship service, this allows for all ages to see all other ages and interact as a family.
Jim Faughn
Jesus seems to have had some relationships that were closer than others (Peter, James, & John — Mary, Martha, Lazarus). I see nothing wrong (in fact I see it as helpful) for groups “at similar places in their lives” to interract with and help one another (young parents, older Christians, etc.).
At the same time, we should do all we can to keep from “institutionalizing” segmented relationships. The scriptures teach that older men and women have much to offer those who are younger and, indeed, have a responsibility toward them.
I think it is interesting that, in Acts 6, there was a definite group (the Grecian widows) that were identifiable. At the same time, the entire church worked together to eliminate a feeling of isolation on the part of anybody.
While I have no problem with classes, activities, etc. designed for particular age groups, I believe it is essential to also provide similar opportunities for the entire family.
At the risk of opening up a can of worms, one of my problems with “small groups” instead of corporate worship is that those who do this are putting one more limitation on the amount of time the entire church can be together.