Conversations Don’t Need Autofill
Do you enjoy the autofill feature on Google and other platforms? You’ve seen it in action. You start to type something in a search bar and, all of a sudden, several possible endings–usually based on things you have searched for previously–start appearing for you to choose from.
(Google has figured out that I search a lot for where Bible verses are found–I know it’s in the Bible, but I’m terrible with references–so I could be searching for anything and it’s probable a verse will be one of my choices.)
Autofill really is an amazing feature and, a great deal of the time, it is helpful. If you are trying to type in a lengthy question or quotation, it is helpful to have it anticipated, so you don’t have to finish it out and can simply select it from your autofill choices.
However, when it comes to our personal conversations, some of us try to be Google and “autofill” the conversation, and it’s not a good thing.
Here’s what I mean: I hear you start to say something, and I start finishing in my mind what you are going to say. Sometimes, I even blurt out the end of your sentence–or what I think is going to be the end of your sentence–before you get a chance to complete it.
Now, let me say this: it is good that I am thinking about what is being said. That much is a positive thing.
However, if I am already predetermining in my mind where you are going with your thoughts, and I really listening to what you are saying? Likely, the answer is “no.” Instead, I’m “hearing” what I think you’re going to say, instead of hearing what you actually are saying. Additionally, I will probably not be as likely to notice the body language, tone, and emotion that is accompanying your words, because I’ve already figured out what you mean, anyway.
Again, we need to be thinking during a conversation. But we don’t need autofill! Let each other finish. Listen. Watch for body language. Notice the tone. THEN think and respond to what was actually said as best you can.
Let Google be Google. You be a listening and helpful friend.
“If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)
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AUTHOR: Adam Faughn
