One Man and One Woman for Life!
At times some statements are heard so frequently that we fail to really listen to them. They might even become a part of our own vocabulary. We may recite the familiar phrase without giving a great deal of thought as to its meaning.
Recently, I heard one such phrase. A good brother in Christ and fine gospel preacher “informed” those who were listening to him about God’s design for marriage. He said (as have many others before him), “God’s plan for marriage is for there to be one man and one woman for life.”
For some reason, for the first time, hearing that statement on that occasion caused my mind to go in a different direction than it had previously. As a result, I’ve begun to think of that statement in a totally different light than before.
You see, I’ve always considered that statement only in view what is revealed in the word of God about the permanence of the marriage relationship. Most of us are already thinking about verses informing us of God’s desire for the “cleaving” of the marriage partners (cf. Gen. 2:24; Matt. 19:5; Eph. 5:31); His hatred of divorce (Malachi 2:16, KJV); and His one and only reason, other than death, for a marriage to be dissolved (cf. Matt. 19:9).
When viewed only in this way, the very true statement that marriage is intended to be one man and one woman for life could almost be seen as a life sentence. We may assume that God does not care whether or not the relationship is fulfilling; He just wants us to serve our time.
However, there are multiple passages in His Word that point in other directions. May I suggest some other meanings of the little prepositional phrase “for life?”
- For reproducing life. According to the latest statistics I can find, about 40% of the babies who are born in our nation are born to women who are not married. God’s plan is for children to be brought up in a loving, nurturing environment in which there is both a father and a mother.
- For sharing life. God created Eve and brought her to Adam because he needed “…a helper fit for him” (Gen. 2:18). It was not God’s design then, nor is it now, for the wife to be the “slave” to the husband (or vice versa), but for both the husband and the wife to share life together.
- For enjoying life. The same verse that informs us of God’s plan to create Eve also informs us that this was done because He saw that Adam’s loneliness was “…not good…” (Gen. 2:18). That early account and multiplied passages which follow let us know very clearly that it was never God’s desire for marriage to be drudgery or a mere “division of responsibilities.” The “sharing” is to be better than that. His will is for the marriage relationship to be one that is enjoyed.
- For sustaining life. Numerous studies can be cited that demonstrate that life expectancy for married people is significantly greater than for unmarried people. Amazingly this is true even for people who have some very serious health challenges (heart attacks, cancer, etc.)
These are just a few of the things that now come to my mind when I hear the phrase “for life.” Maybe you will want to add your own thoughts to my list.
As you do, I hope we all see that the phrase is not referring to a life sentence. It is saying something about life giving!
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AUTHOR: Jim Faughn
