Gwyneth Paltrow, Chris Martin, and “Conscious Uncoupling”

On the online celebrity newsletter Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin recently announced that their marriage was ending. That might not be too surprising, considering how often we hear of weddings and separations among the celebrity world.

The way in which their split was announced, however, has raised some eyebrows. You see, they aren’t calling it a “divorce.” Instead, it is being called a “Conscious Uncoupling.”

On the Goop newsletter, Paltrow and Martin provided a short statement to fans about this “conscious uncoupling,” and provided fans with some words of thanks.

Following that, however, there was a rather lengthy essay by Drs. Habib Sadeghi and Sherry Sami about the concept of “conscious uncoupling.” To say it is quite different from anything I’ve ever seen is a grand understatement.

These two doctors, well known for their New Age concepts, state that what Paltrow and Martin have done is simply an outgrowth of (are you ready for it?) human evolution.

They state:

During the upper Paleolithic period of human history (roughly 50,000BC to 10,000BC) the average human life expectancy at birth was 33. By 1900, U.S. life expectancy was only 46 for men, and 48 for women. Today, it’s 76 and 81 respectively. During the 52,000 years between our Paleolithic ancestors and the dawn of the 20th Century, life expectancy rose just 15 years. In the last 114 years, it’s increased by 43 years for men, and 48 years for women.

Based upon that, they ask the question, “What does this have to do with divorce rates?”

Get ready for this answer:

For the vast majority of history, humans lived relatively short lives—and accordingly, they weren’t in relationships with the same person for 25 to 50 years. Modern society adheres to the concept that marriage should be lifelong; but when we’re living three lifetimes compared to early humans, perhaps we need to redefine the construct. Social research suggests that because we’re living so long, most people will have two or three significant long-term relationships in their lifetime.

That’s right: you and I simply have evolved to the point where we live too long to expect to stay married “til death do us part!”

Further in their essay, they speak to the idea that couples say they are going to remain together, “but then reality sets in.” It is that “reality”–things like children, unmet needs, etc.–that should cause us to not feel shame when we “uncouple” in a “conscious” manner. These two doctors actually state, “The idea of being married to one person for life is too much pressure for anyone.”

Too much pressure?

So, I guess the pressure of being married for a lifetime got to Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, and it was just too much. Thankfully, they can find New Age/evolutionary “proof” that this separation is just part of human development, and they can simply uncouple.

When you remove God…

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Sources and Further Reading

“Conscious Uncoupling” (Goop.com)

“‘Conscious Uncoupling’ : Gwyneth Paltrow Explores Spiritual Side of Divorce on Goop” (New York Daily News)

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Photo background credit: Mickael Plichard on Creative Commons

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