How To Stay Married for 49 Years

When Jim and I had been married for just a few years we lived in a house across the street from an older couple who celebrated their 50^th Wedding Anniversary. Their children had a nice reception for them in their home and we were invited to attend, which we did.

I can remember thinking how wonderful that was to be together for 50 years! They were smiling at each other on that day, and the party had all of the appearances of a couple who would continue to grow even older together.

Guess what…when just a few more months passed by…they got a divorce!!! I couldn’t believe it, but it actually was true.  They no longer lived in that house together, and spent their remaining years (as far as I know) apart.

Appearances can be deceiving. From the outside, looking in, everything seemed fine, but obviously something was terribly wrong.

Jim and I celebrated out 49^th anniversary one week ago today. We shared our anniversary cards that morning and talked about wanting to have many more years together, but it was a rather normal day for us because we have been so busy lately. The only thing we got to do that day was go out for a wonderful meal together. Our celebration will come a few days later.

When our children sent us messages to wish us a happy anniversary, our daughter said, “Next year you get a party.” It reminded me of that couple all those years ago who celebrated 50 years and then divorced one another.

Our 49 years have been like many other couples – adjusting to life together, working, taking care of children, paying bills, maintaining a house, being active at church…and the list could go on and on.

For those of you who have looked at us and so kindly said, “I want a marriage like yours,” I thank you for seeing that in us. However, I want you to know that there have been serious challenges. There have been times when one or both of us have wondered why we married each other. We’ve seen poverty and plenty. There have been ups and downs over the course of those years.

But there has never been a time when we gave up on the commitment we made 49 years ago. We made a commitment to one another, before our family and friends. But, more importantly, we made a commitment before God that we would enjoy life together, work through our problems together, and remain faithful to one another and to Him.

I’m looking forward to celebrating our 50^th Wedding Anniversary.

But I’m not sure I want a party!

“…let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband”  (Eph. 5:33)

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AUTHOR: Donna Faughn